“Beyond the Wall” was the one of Game of Thrones’ most epic episodes yet—and whether you watched it legally Sunday night or illegally leaked last week, you’re probably still thinking about it.
GoT made it’s mark as a hyper-realistic take on a hyper-unrealistic fantasy world. But now that the show has moved past the plot points of George R. R. Martin’s highly acclaimed novels, fans are having a hard time buying into it. With timeline problems, character irregularities, and narrative inconsistency, viewers feel like GoT Season 7 is cutting corners to fast track to next seasons’ finale. And “Beyond the Wall” was the most criticized episode yet.
Alan Taylor, director of “Beyond the Wall,” doesn’t seem too concerned: “It’s cool that the show is so important to so many people that it’s being scrutinized so thoroughly,” he told Variety. “If the show was struggling, I’d be worried about those concerns, but the show seems to be doing pretty well so it’s OK to have people with those concerns.” He’s right: our interest in the show’s plot holes is a product of fan obsession. Which—for HBO, and not my health—is a good thing.
Here are six impossible possibilities / possible impossibilities from GoT Season 7, Episode 6 that left us scratching our heads, and searching Google.
Which character invented time travel?
The only thing flying by faster than this season is the raven that flew from Eastwatch to Dragonstone. Do the GoT writers seriously expect us to believe that Jon Snow’s suicide squad chilled on a rock surrounded by Wights and White Walkers while a raven flew from the wall to Dragonstone? And then they had to wait until Dany and her dragons flew to BEYOND the wall? All that hanging out in freezing temperatures without food and water, and the only dude who died was the one who had already been half eaten by a bear? Ya, doubtful.
Jon: "I need a message delivered ASAP!"
— Denizcan Targaryen (@MrFilmkritik) August 21, 2017
We know how big these kingdoms are: in past seasons, it has taken characters multiple episodes to travel from point A to point B. Even in a fantasy land of zombies and dragons, we have a hard time believing in a warp speed bird.
When did Gendry aquire super powers?
Gendry’s back—and at some point during his four season absence he was bitten by a radio active spider. Ok we’re joking…maybe. Gendry’s superior physical abilities saved Jon Snow’s suicide squad not once by twice in “Beyond the Wall.” First off, he has incredible blizzard vision for someone who’s NEVER. SEEN. SNOW. BEFORE.
Gendry how tf did you see the color of that bear's eyes through the snow storm? That's some lvl 80 eyesight you've got there #GameOfThones
— rachel (@bigg_spoon) August 21, 2017
Then there’s that whole Gendry / Usain Bolt thing. At what point did Gendry establish himself as an Olympic level cross country sprinter? How did Jon know that Gendry was the fastest in the group? Again, Gendry has NEVER. BEEN. NORTH. How are his lung’s adapting to the sub-zero air? Was it all that rowing cardio that built up his stamina? Maybe, the show writers just wanted to give us more reasons to be grateful that our
second favourite favourite bastard is back.
What’s the deal with Benjen Stark?
“Random half-dead snow uncle” has become the show’s go to dues ex machina. Let’s be honest guys, he’s more of a plot saving device than an actual character. But also: how was there not enough time for Benjen to get on the horse and ride away with Jon after he saved him from an army of the dead?
— Lissete Lanuza Sáenz (@lizziethat) August 21, 2017
Here’s what you need to know about Uncle Benny: He’s Ned’s brother, he’s a brother of the Night’s Watch, and he was stabbed by a White Walker on an expedition beyond the wall and then saved by the Children of the Forest. The last time viewers saw him was in the Season 6 finale where he also saved Bran and Meera. Before then, everyone assumed he’d been dead since Season 1. There’s only eight episodes left, but we’re willing to bet he’ll show up to save another pivotal character and advance the narrative.
How the hell did the Wights pull the dragon out?
This episode established that White Walkers and Wights don’t do water. (We’re guessing this is why they didn’t just swim around the wall.) But if these zombies can’t swim, how did they attach those industrial sized chains to Viserion under the ice? And, more importantly:
Where does the army of the dead get insanely long chains to pull a dragon? Is there a Walmart north of the wall? #GameOfThrones
— Chele G (@Cheles_G) August 21, 2017
Aren’t Arya and Sansa smarter than this?
Sansa is a wise, experienced leader and Arya is a well-travelled assassin. Are they seriously too petty and blind to realize what’s obviously going on here? Don’t they know how cunning Littlefinger is? And shouldn’t they be more concerned about the fact that WINTER IS HERE? Seriously Arya, all you needed to do to solve this sister drama was say you found the note in Littlefinger’s room.
Also, in the books Ned’s murder is Arya’s chapter. In it, she describes in detail hearing Sansa screaming who their father was murdered. She was clearly was aware of Sansa’s true reaction to all of this—does she seriously forget?
Most importantly: Why are we all shipping an aunt and her nephew?
In a boat’s cozy lux cabin, our two favourite world-savers held hands and shared sexy-time looks. To which the world responded: JUST KISS ALREADY.
The only problem with this #PowerCouple is that, unbeknownst to them, they’re aunt and nephew. But hey, we’re willing to overlook the incest if you are!
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